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Archive for October, 2008

Oct 01 2008

PLAY THAT FUNKY SMELL, WHITE BOY

By the way, I have sampled those macaroni bites from Jack in the Crack since the last posting. They are freakin’ amazing, but not amazing as the potato and bacon (which I do not eat) bites. Holy crap.

I haven’t really wanted to eat anything animal since visiting the farm last week, but my stomach and my unemployment keep getting in the way of my vegetarianism. If someone would just buy me a vat of Quorn…

Two smells I have not been able to get out of my head: the goats at school (male) and the sick kid in my chem class. Apparently, testosterone, once it kicks in, makes things much STINKIER. The male goats smelled like goat cheese that had been left out in the hot sun, in a Port-O-Potty, in Tijuana, for a week. The kid, he just smelled like he’d been eating bad food and drinking sickly sweet Gatorade for about a month without showering. I can’t deal with even the memory of either, can almost taste it, and feel like I’m about to throw up. Or it could just be all the fried food. Or, I’ve been knocked up by space aliens. Take your pick.

I wonder if the baby will look like a) a goat, b) elbow macaroni, and/or c) Grape Ape. Or all three, one for each head. I also think I should start taking interesting medication, or stop eating cheese right before bed.

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